I had a nice lunch with Eric and South Coast Deli, yum!  Had a garden salad with tuna.  And then I went to workout with Mel, had a great workout, much jump roping.  I feel like I am going to really kick some butt this time.  I am really committed to working out 6 times a week, I have to be. Mel is making me try Bikram Yoga tomorrow.  Totally excited and nervous, really glad I have someone to go with.
Speaking of weight loss…I figured out today to be at a healthy weight for my height, I need to lose 60 pounds!!! 60 pounds!!! 60!!!  Not that it’s impossible, but good grief.  I really didn’t think I had that much extra weight on me.  Yikes.  But I signed up for the 805 Challenge, so I will need to work this butt off so that I don’t look like a dork on camera.  I have to weigh in on camera and let the entire world know how fat I am.  OMG!  I know this is going to be a good challenge for me and will keep me motivated.  I need the push and I think it will help me stay on my eating plan. So I think I am going to officially start tomorrow.

Then it was on to Omaha for some time with old friends.  I helped Mel and Lindsey make up, I talked to my favorite people, Pastor Ty and Terri. And I spent a lot of time letting go of Caffeine Dreams.  It looks awful which almost makes it easier not to be there anymore.  It doesn’t feel like my shop anymore because I would never have let it get into such disrepair.  I spent time with all the people who helped make my business fun and who I loved for a long time.  There is nothing like the feeling of letting go.  letting go of the stupid mistakes that we made because we were young and immature.  Letting go of the bitterness that I had towards the people who did not take our selling CD well, and letting go of the bad crap with my brother.  I am on a new path, from now on I am only going to have healthy relationships.  I can’t do it any other way.  I promise myself a new life with healthy friends.  Also every time I feel scared to do or try something, I need to ask myself “why am I scared to do this thing?” and I’m finding that the more I think about it the more I realize that I am scared of what other people think, just talking myself out of it.    But I have the power to talk myself into it too.  I promise myself that I will try.  Try for a new life, Amber, the past is over…thank god!

*phoenix airport Nov 8, 2009

What I did was not give him a piece of my mind, but listen to a piece of his.  I really feel like he is getting better and using healthy language.  His life is really hard and serious right now as he learns to conquer his addiction and build a new life.  He explained it to me as this really heavy trench coat that he has to wear everyday and some days he would like to take it off, if only for a moment.  But working on sobriety means wearing it all the time, even in 90 degree weather.  And so for now he must struggle and rebuild relationships with everyone in his life.

I explained that I really want a relationship with him and that I didn’t want to go another 2 years with the same relationship we have now.  And he said that he would make an effort to connect with me if I would make an effort to learn about addiction and recovery.  So I guess I need a book or to go to a 12 step meeting to let him know that I support and care about his recovery and his life.  I can’t say whether or not I’ll make it to a meeting but I can definitely read a book.  For right now our relationship is going to be a little one sided since his recovery is all consuming.  The way he talkes to me has very little grace, but I know that he is in a world of pain right now and that I can have enough grace for the both of us.

So I get a gold star for confronting my brother, for listening to what he had to say and deciding to make an effort to repair our relationship.

Amber looking tired and cute.

I think its amazing how London smells like London. No other place I have been has such a familiar smell. It is beautiful here right now, the trees are just starting to bloom and the air is crisp. Getting in was a chore. The immigration officer grilled us and treated us like idiots for almost 20 minutes before letting us in. But, whatever, we are here and he is stuck with his bad dandruff that dusted the padded shoulders of his faded navy suit coat.

I am both scared and exited to embark on this new chapter of my life. I am going to try to write one entry and post one picture everyday while we are here. We shall see how that goes.

We have decided, perhaps foolishly, to live abroad for a while. Our web design business is mobile so we figured why not go work in Paris, or London or the Swiss Alps? It is only so often that these opportunities come around and since we don’t have kids or a house to keep us here, we are off into the sunset. 

We are leaving March 21st for the UK, first stop is Edinburgh, Scotland for 5 days to check out a web conference. Then we will make our way south through the lake districts, Liverpool, the Cotswolds, Bristol, London and finally settling in Brighton (on the southern shore) England. We found a house to rent through August so we will be there for about 5 months. This way we have a “home base” but can still travel to Ireland or Italy on the weekends. 

After that, well, I am determined to live in Paris for at least a month. Eric is dying to go to Switzerland and I think we both want to check out Spain. That is if we don’t run out of money. We will be working the whole time we are there so please don’t hesitate to send us work or people to contact.

We will have an extra room, so anyone who is up for a bit of fun with the Goodenough’s is more than welcome to come stay with us. We will be lonely and missing all of you, so if you can afford the plane ticket, please come and spend time with us, we would absolutely love it!

 So now the countdown begins. . .28 days to go!

Look at these crazy kids!  This is circa 1999.  Wow.  Who would have thought that 10 years later we would be still so madly in love and still crazy.  

That reminds me of a great Pasty Cline song.

So cheers to my new extroverted self, welcome to the party.  (since i’m supposed to like parties now)

So today I ate:

• gluten free hot cereal with bananas and raisins
• veggie juice of cucmber, parsley, kale, celery and lots of other green stuff
• gluten free crackers with hummus
• broiled cod with brown rice

How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways. . . 

1. I love you because I never have to find something to do with my free time
2. I love you because I always know what’s going on with my friends far away
3. I love you because I can become a fan of “bacon”
4. I love you because you let me post how ever many pictures I want to
5. I love you because I can chat with my friends instantly
6. I love you because I can post a photo of some girls boobies on my birthday invitations
7. I love you because you are free
8. I love you because you love me

Ok so I might love facebook more than anything else in the world right now.  But I have good reason, I can see pictures of my friends from far away. . . In fact my friend Erin might go into labor any day now and I will know instantly because of facebook.  I can reach mass amounts of people (ok well I only have like 46 friends) but I can talk to all of them instantly.   My life has never felt so complete.  

So today I ate: 

• fruit salad with banana, strawberry, nectarines, blueberries
• salad with lettuce, sprouts, tomato, cucumber and tuna
• sunflower seeds
• 5 gluten free crackers
• a handful of gluten free spagetti (yes i eat pasta in handfuls)
• grilled fish with cabbage, black beans and brown rice
• veggie juice of carrot, beet, celery

August 2008

January 27, 2009

So today I ate:

• Bob’s Red mill Mighty Tasty Gluten Free Hot Cereal with Banana and rasin
• Avocado with tomato, pinenuts and balsamic
• Spinach soup with onion and turnip
• Teriyaki Salmon Salad 
• 2 pieces of 75% Chocolate. . . hehe

Well we have finally picked a date to leave, so as of March 23, 2009 I will be writing this blog from the UK.  We are going to stay there for around 6 months, or until our money runs out.  I am excited and scared since this is waaaaaay outside my box.  But I have Eric and I have a need to do something original in this life, so here is my attempt.  So now we just have to narrow down where we want to live which is proving more difficult than you might imagine.  When faced with this many options, it becomes increasingly difficult to make a decision. 

“Wow, that’s a great question. Tough one, though. What does one gage his response on ? Physical prowess? Keen detection skills ? The ability to banter well with super villains ? ”

Ah Mallrats what a great film.

So today I ate:

• veggie juice- carrot, cucumber, celery
• mango
• turkey burger salad with tomatoes and red pepper
• handful of pumpkin seeds and sunflower seeds
• small filet of halibut and leeks
• veggie crudites and hummus